Thursday, September 09, 2010

Bipolar disorder 'not to blame for violent behaviour'

People with a severe mental illness are no more likely to be violent than anyone else - unless they abuse drugs or alcohol, a study has suggested.

read the full story here

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Despite having been awakesince 3am this morning, it is now 11:30pm and I cannot sleep.
I stayed in bed for an hour and have decided toget up again. I am starting to yawn but still don't feel like I could sleep.

yeee haaa!

I've been awake since 3am and got laods of work done. I think my mood is finally turning! I hope it lasts.

I know it's not a very sensible thing to get up at 3am and this maybe the start of a hypo period, but who cares!!! I feel better!!! That is the important thing as the depression was getting me down!!!

I'll tell my psychiatrist tomorrow.

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

a better day

I had a better day today. I went to work, I got a little work done. My appointment with the psychiatrist is on Thursday. i am also getting my haircut on Thursday, that usually cheers me up :o)

Work is very difficult at the moment and I am struggling to cope. I do not know if I am struggling because I am a little bit depressed or I am a little bit depressed because I am struggling. WHO KNOWS!!!!

A part of me wants to start job hunting but I also want to make certain I have given everything tomy current job. I would be giving up a good pension, a good income, my private health care and lots of security. But nothing is worth getting depressed about!

Monday, September 06, 2010

nothingness

Nothing seems to motivate me at the moment. I have lost interest in my career, I am just not enjoying it anymore. I have lost interest in my flat, my cat and everything really. I am half thinking of stopping my medication again, just so I can feel something. I have not seen anyone else all weekend and I called in sick this morning. This means I have not had a conversation with anyone for three days!

I cannot remember when my next appointmet with my psychiatrist is. Who cares anyway :o(. Things are falling apart in my flat and I cannot face getting them fixed. I have bills to pay and I cannot find my cheque book.

I still blame the aripiprazole! I want to stop taking those horrible bl;ue tablets that often give me heart burn!

I am watching films and eating too muchin the hope it will distract me.