I am lost on this one, I don't believe in any games! I spoke to a friend a while a go about dating because I was really nervous about this. My friend said there are no rules and you just need to get to know people and leave things to go on naturally.
This is what I have been doing. When I meet someone I like talking to or wo I find interesting then I talk to them or get to know them some more. This is the same for women and I assume this is how people make friends.
I have done this with probably 4 or 5 people this year. I find men more interesting and relate to them better. There was one man I met last week, initially I found him a bit creepy and in my face, as the evening went on I began to like him and found him very interesting. It also became apparent why he seemed creepy, it was because of some new things he was trying to combat the social anxiety. Anyway he sent me his msn address and I spent a few evenings last week chatting to him and playing games. I enjoyed passing the time of day with him.
After the womens meet which I have described someone said you can not chat with men as you will never get rid of them. So....
Stupid me told the guy I had been chatting too that I was not interested, why did I have to say that? I enjoyed his company and was getting to know him, I was still worried about whether I would like him when I met him again but WHO CARES!!!!
Another man I chatted to a while back, I knew he had a girl friend but I liked him all the same as I thought he was nice. I only replied to his emails and he was responding lots. I did not see anything wrong wth this but if this is true that you only chat with men you fancy I feel like a right slut, particulary as he has a girlfriend!!
I hate the dating game!!! I refuse to play it, I am just going out there to make lots of new friends!
6 comments:
lol thats hilarious
(the add i mean)
Dating can be very stressful, especially for those of us with SA. I always worry I will run out of interesting things to say, or that my shyness will kick into overdrive and become noticeable (by blushing and sweating). Also, suffering from low self-esteem, I can't help but think the girl's not going to like me anyway. I'm sort of fatalistic that way. :(
I guess at this point in my life I've come to the realization that I'm not going to meet someone special. I used to worry about it a lot, but don't anymore.
By the way, there's nothing wrong with only chatting with guys you like, that's pretty natural and common. It's the attraction that makes us interested in learning more about the person. At least that's how I see it.
Whenever I am afforded an opportunity to socialize with someone of the opposite sex, I look at it as a way to hone my social skills. As they say, use them or lose them.
Best of luck!
D.
There is nothing wrong with having friends. There is nothing wrong with getting to know people and then deciding you dont want to be friends. Every meeting doesnt have to be a lifelong relationship. Just try and have fun and meet some nice people. If you make some friends GREAT!!! If you find romance consider it a bonus
Oh dear... this is awkward. I feel like I'm intruding, but I can't honourably pretend I haven't read this post. My heart's skipping and Annie has been on my mind ever since I met her. How can you not be impressed with someone who snugs down into her coat in a cinema, or who cares so much for her friends that she sets up special meets for them, or who has such a core of quiet self-respect?
Of course, I remind myself, this was posted on Monday -- and it's now Wednesday. Things could well have changed, for the better or the worse.
Oh dear oh dear. I have no idea what to do.
Thanks for being honest and letting me know you have read this :o)
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